The Diary of A Kenyan Endo Warrior: I. Am. Tired!

 

Sunset (8)

Dear Diary,

I doubt that it’s normal to wake up tired, spend the whole day tired and sleep tired. For so many years this was my normal. My first response to the question ‘how are you?’ was Tired. But there’s only so many times that you can answer tired, until the other person gets, well, tired, of hearing your response. That was the story of my life.

tired2

What I was more tired of, was being sick and in pain. Being sick is a draining process. It literally sucks out the life out of you, and the desire to live. When you have been in pain day after day, you want to cry. I vividly remember crying to God, praying that He would take the pain away. I was fed up of watching my life slip between my fingers. How badly I wanted to live life fully, but my body wouldn’t let me.

tired

It was more than just physical exhaustion; more like an all round exhaustion. When I found The Spoon Theory  by Christine Miserandino I was besides myself. Finally, someone had put into words what I had been struggling to say for a long time. Her description of Spoonies perfectly described me. “Spoonies are people that live with chronic illness; theoretically measuring personal daily abilities much as one would measure the proper amount of spoons needed for an event or occasion… sometimes having an abundance, other times coming up short.”

I was tired but I realized that I needed more grace,strength and spoons.

To the Spoonie struggling to express her exhaustion, you are not alone.

Blessings,

Ess

Published by bibi2be

I am a wife to be, a beautiful bride making my way to the aisle. I have less than 6 months to get there, a day at a time. He put the 3 diamonds on my finger 6 months ago and so far so GREAT!!It has been the most beautiful journey ever. 'Life is a journey' are the wise words a friend shared with me that have made practical sense to me. I live my life a day at a time, with the end goal in mind. My resolve is enough to carry me through the day as for tomorrow and the days to come....I hear that HIS mercies are new every morning and should be quite sufficient to cover me in the days to come. So, I do not lack foresight...OH NO..In fact it is the opposite, I have just learnt to manage my expectations and enjoy my sphere of control:) I double up as the bride of Christ...He is my lover, my friend, at the center of my very existence. He is the reason I smile, the reason I have the strength to go the extra mile. He is my X-Factor, the reason that I will succeed and shine:) This blog is about my journey in life as I figure out my path to the aisle, to the other side of the wedding and most importantly to the other side of this very temporary life. When life overwhelms me,I wait for my sunshine:) as [caption id="attachment_6" align="alignnone" width="300" caption="I smile and wave!!"][/caption] Enjoy the journey of an extraordinary lady following her Master, fulfilling His mission and loving her mate! Bibi2be:)

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