Invitation To Partner

I could talk about periods all day long. What used to make me cringe and uncomfortable is now what make I have chosen to spend this season of my life talking about and training on.

I trained a group of ladies from Moi University a few days ago, and I loved it! There are way too many assumptions about menstrual health. The stigma surrounding menstrual health means that the lies have become truths, and there is no avenue to ask questions or to seek clarifications.

In some communities, girls are having sex soon after their menarche because the boys believe that sexual intercourse can cure cramps. Parents, religious insitutions and schools’s voices are faint compared to the uproar of their peers.

Sex is not a cure for for menstrual cramps. Pregnancy may provide temporary relief, but I believe that teenage pregnancy should not be a band-aid for underlying problems. Pregnancy and motherhood may come with other challenges.reach out and give someone a great big hug!.png

There is a great need out there. To some, this may just seem like just another period campaign, but it is more than just a period talk. It is the demolishing of myths, it is teaching of life-changing truths, it is the restoration of dreams and hopes, it is unveiling the – often-marred- beauty of being a woman. It is showing another side of the rose, while hoping to take away the memories of the prick of the thorn.

There are several opportunities that are coming up to train, inspire and mentor girls, and the truth is that I cannot do it alone.

If you would like to get to know more about the training sessions and how you can help to change a girl’s life, please send me an email via yellowendoflower@gmail.com.

 

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#31 Days of Endo ~ 11 Tips for Mums of Endowarriors

Day 13 ūüôā

I am taking a short break from sharing the stories, to share some tips for mums of endo warriors. More girls in their teens and early twenties are getting a diagnosis, more often than not, being diagnosed with endometriosis throws them and their families into confusion.

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Endometriosis is one legacy no mother ever dreams of passing on to her daughter. The reality of this statement echoed through my mind in 2015 as I nursed my daughter. When I held her and stared into her little eyes, I felt a strong desire rise up within me, to do something to make sure her story was different. That the story of her generation would be different. A few months later, Yellow Endo Flower wsa born.

Along the way, I have met Endo warriors, a beautiful community of women fighting the same battle. We are one in ten women.

There are mothers reaching out, wanting to help their daughters navigate the murky waters. It is hard for them! Let no one tell you otherwise. Watching your little girl lay in foetal position because of pain is heartwrenching to watch, month after month.

For the mums, here are a few things that you can do to help make the journey a little easier for your daughter:

1. Believe Her

When she tells you that she is experiencing pain with her period, believe her. Do not try to minimize or trivialize the pain. Pain is the body’s way of asking for help, if we do not listen to its whispers, we will have to stop our day-to-day activities when it screams.

2. Be Present

Buckle up, dear mama, and make the decision to be present for the long haul. The journey may not be smooth, but your presence makes a world of a difference.

It may seem easier to just give her money to see the doctor, but, depending on the relationship that you have with her, she may need you to hold her hand and encourage her heart. Waiting rooms and emergency rooms can be very lonely places.

3. Find a doctor who understands Endometriosis

You may be tempted to take her to your Ob/Gyn, while s/he may be a good place to start, it is good to see a doctor who is trained in laparoscopic surgery and who deals with a lot of Endometriosis cases. Find a doctor who has a good bedside manner.

You can find referrals in your local Endometriosis community. If you do not know where to begin, you can send me an email via yellowendflower@gmail.com and I will be in touch.

4. Get informed

Information is power, it is difficult to manage what you don’t fully understand. Read more about endometriosis and how it affects her body. The top searches from google are very informative. There are books for sale online that are good resources.I have been sharing Endo stories in the series #31DaysofEndo.

From the information readily available, evaluate the changes that she can make, and those you can make as a household.

5. Evaluate the triggers

Endometriosis symptoms may be aggravated by things that an endo warrior is exposed to. The only way to establish what the triggers is by eliminating the potential trigger foods and products and keeping a record of the progress.

6. Keep a period diary

Encourage her to actively keep a period diary, to record the pain and other symptoms when they strike so that she can understand the patterns in her cycle. If you are looking for a simple diary to start with, I have written a period diary book titled Bloom, it is available in Kenya for 500/=.  It is ideal for girls and women.

Understanding her cycle will enable her to forecast her energy and work around the flare-ups as she works on managing the symptoms.

7. Ask questions

Note down your concerns on a paper and go with it when you visit your doctor. Ask the doctor to break down the treatment plans and to let you know what you should look out for.

Trust your inner voice and don’t settle for an explanation that doesn’t sit well with you.

8.  Educate those around her

People tend to be less sensitive to what they do not understand. Share with the people around her: her friends, school, and people who live with her, what Endometriosis is, and how it may affect her, that way they may be more understanding and willing to help.

9. Keep a medicine log

Pain and symptom management are an integral part of the Endo journey. Before she starts any medication, make sure you read the pamphlet and make a mental note of the side effects to look out for. Note down any reactions and allergies to drugs so as to mention them to a medical practitioner in future. Keeping a log will also help you to see how much medication she needs to manage the symptoms.

10. Offer psychosocial support

The emotional strain caused by endometriosis should not be overlooked. Many endo warriors tend to suffer in silence because they do not know where to seek help. Find your daughter, someone, she can talk to. Find a support group or forum that she can plug in to, and meet other girls and women who are walking the same path.

11. Keep hope alive

The consistent flare-ups, hospital visits, medication can grey a girl’s dreams. The constant feeling of fatigue and malaise can take the toll on you. Encourage her to write down a list of her ambitions and dreams. When she is well enough to do them, encourage her to pursue them. Celebrate the small steps as you wait to make the big steps.

Do fun things with her, talk to her, love on her and be there for her.

All the best, mama! Your labour is not in vain.

If you’d like to talk more about Endometriosis, feel free to drop me a line via yellowendoflower@gmail.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

Bloom

“It is well” is at the tail end of things that I like to hear in times of turmoil. It is a phrase that I heard in the gusts of pain and wondered how anyone could conclude that what felt like a near death experience was something to talk about on a positive note.

10 years ago as I writhed in pain, it was not well. My body was not well, my mind was not well, and, I was not well. Everything hurt; passing urine, bowel movements, ovulating and menstruating were all accompanied by pain. I hated the journey, and I didn’t have good things to say about life. I was drowning on dry land. A few months later, I began my journey to get a¬†diagnosis, which changed my life even more. Endometriosis is a silent, seemingly subtle thief, that lurks in the night at first, and then becomes brash as it matures and steals unashamedly in broad daylight. The pain that I had been battling over the years was all linked to the painful and heavy periods but I had no idea.

Pain is a very good teacher, thankfully we do not all have to attend its classes, especially if we have other people to teach us. My experience through pain and life change bore a desire to teach what I wish I knew as a teenage girl. One year ago, I decided to put the lessons into a book.

Bloom is here

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I am stoked that it is a reality, Bloom is a product of tears, surgeries, questions, countless medications, and a desire to be the change that I want to see.

Bloom is your practical guide for your period journey. It describes how a normal period should look and feel like, it explores the sanitary product options, healthy practices that every female should employ and teaches girls and women how to keep a period diary, the different factors that they should look out for and it includes a one year period diary.

Keeping a period diary over the last couple of years has revolutionized my life. I am now more self-aware, able to identify patterns in my cycle, and kinder to myself, there is a kindness that stems from understanding. I am able to hear my body whisper before it forces me to lay down and listen to the opera of its screams.

Bloom is Ksh 500/=, to purchase it in Nairobi please contact Rosemary via 0731224223. To purchase in Mombasa please contact me via 0746622833 or yellowendoflower@gmail.com.

When you look at a rose from the top, it is difficult to see the thorns beneath the blossomed petals. Sometimes the exterior appearances make people doubt the pain, but just like the sting of the thorn is very real so is the invisible pain that has somehow been branded as normal.

Through the years I have learned to bloom despite the thorns.

5 Ways To Navigate The Endo Inspired Energy Rollercoaster

I seem to have found the spring in my step. Some mornings I wake up feeling like an Energizer bunny, it is such a good yet surreal feeling. One of the aspects that I hate about Endo is how it hampers with energy levels.

I went from being an energetic teen to a mostly-tired human being. Sometimes the fatigue was physical, other times it was mental, but it was altogether overwhelming. I’d wake up in the morning after an 8-hour sleep feeling like I had been digging all night with interval naps on a bed of thorns. An exhaustion where even your skin is tired. It is hard to glow when you feel so tired. It is hard to be excited about anything when your whole being is just focused on mere survival, no thriving, just living.

Over the last year, I have found a few things that have helped me navigate this tumultuous journey.

  • Keep a Period Diary

My period diary has shown me that my cycle affects my energy levels. This has been so critical to understanding my body has also helped me be kinder to myself and prepare in advance. Putting systems in place to help me on my low energy days makes them more manageable. I am most exhausted when I’m on my period, on day 1 a flood of sleep sweeps over my being. Once I have slept, I wake up feeling brand new.

I have more energy to arrange and do administrative work after my periods, so I schedule such tasks after my period and prepare for this low energy phase by doing them in advance.

  • Check your weight

After I took Lupride, my limited level of energy diminished, I was now getting energy from my reserves. I was surviving on the morsels. Meagre tasks felt like they were so much work to do. Pregnancy caused my weight to yo-yo and the hormonal imbalance also took a toll on my energy. I didn’t look overweight, but I felt so heavy.

Now that I have lost some weight, I am feeling more energetic. Ready to get back to an active lifestyle this year.

  • Check your diet

The fastest way to deplete my energy is to eat too many carbs. My body is in a somewhat complicated relationship with wheat. It tolerates it in small quantities if I have too much of it, I bloat, get cranky, fatigued, constipated and get canker sores. That is a horrible combination.

My pick me up drink is ACV, it has been so invigorating, though my three-year-old daughter is so high-nosed about my elixir. I wake up early to drink it in peace because, in her words, ‘it stinks’, but I love it. The benefits far outweigh the bad smell. It’s an energy drink sans the hidden sugars, preservatives, and palpitations.

  • Avoiding mental stress and fatigue

We often underestimate the effect that mental and emotional stress has on the body. The body and the mind are connected, when you feel drained emotionally you may also feel physically fatigued.

There are days I have woken up after 10 hours of sleep, physically rested but mentally exhausted, which means still unable to perform the tasks that I need to do. I am more sensitive to my emotions because they affect how much energy I have at my disposal.

  • Find something that fills you

Self-care is absolutely important. When you are fatigued it is hard to do things for yourself, but these small things are great pick-me-ups.

I am writing a list of the things that make me happy so that I can plan to do more of these things and fill my cup. You can’t pour out of an empty cup, when you fill yourself then you have something to give.

Here’s to more energized and happy days.